Sidney and Vera always drove past a park full of Hispanic people, but wouldn’t consider venturing in. They were scared of Hispanic people. There were too many of them. The men were too quiet, the women too meek. Sidney and Vera were not really racist, but like many of the white upper-middle class, they had simply insulated themselves culturally from minorities. Now that Sidney and Vera were out of college, and affluent, the idea of mixing was even more uncomfortable.

On this particular afternoon, Sidney jerked the wheel and skidded his late model European sports sedan to a stop in front of the park, not realizing where he was. He just saw green, and openness, and knew he had to get out of the car. As he walked away, he heard the comforting sound of Vera's door closing. She would join him soon. They would find a nice, clean spot on the hillside overlooking the small lake. They would once again work things out. It was all unbearably predictable, but it was better than being alone. Vera finally joined him and they settled into a grassy area slightly away from the swarms of brown people that surrounded them. Lily white Vera looking like a drop of white cream cheese icing atop a carrot cake, which happened to be her favorite desert. At least twice a month, she and Sidney would go to their favorite restaurant on a Saturday night and have carrot cake for desert. She loved it, and she loved the way Dino, the Greek waiter, would bring it to her before she had even asked for it. She liked Dino, but felt uncomfortable around him. Dino was Greek, and like these Hispanics, dark and mysterious to her. Paradoxically, his deep black eyes were somehow a comfort to her, though she would never tell Sidney any of these thoughts. She and Sidney never discussed sex, except during arguments and then they both agreed that it was not a good idea to talk about sex when they were angry.

Sidney was angry when he pulled the car over. Angry because the automatic teller had shown their balance to be less than what he had calculated; therefore, he felt reluctant to buy an expensive component for his computer. The account was lower because Vera had written a check, which she had not noted in her checkbook. When Sidney found out it was for the lingerie that he had asked her to buy for their anniversary, well, that was too much. He brooded next to Vera but was shaken from his stupor by the raucous laughter of a group of men nearby. They laughed and pointed at a young man, who looked no more than fourteen. The young man walked past the group, yelling back something in Spanish that Sidney imagined was a Hispanic type of insult, probably hot and spicy like the food. The young man kicked at a can and sent it flying, then ran after it and kicked it again. He suddenly looked over at Vera who was watching him. He slowed and then kicked it again even harder. Sidney watched him stare at Vera who commented that this young man reminded her of Dino the waiter which seemed ridiculous to Sidney since he looked nothing like Dino. Her voice sounded distant, and this, along with everything else, annoyed Sidney to no end. He now regretted stopping at the park and wanted to leave, but Vera said she was feeling tired and needed to rest. She was always tired. She would fall asleep at nine and Sidney would stay up occupying himself on his computer until his eyes would hurt. Then he would turn on late night cable in hopes of catching a decent erotic movie. He would keep the sound down low and every time he heard Vera stir, he would switch to a news channel. The young man circled slowly around them, like a wild African dog carefully closing in on its prey. He passed a group of young girls who called out to him, making exaggerated gestures. He ignored them and kept circling. He didn't care what people said about him or how they laughed at him. He knew what he was and he would show them all one day. He crept up behind Sidney and Vera and quietly sat down a few yards away. His skinny legs stuck out in front of him like fallen branches from a tree. He looked down at his shorts and liked the way they fit tightly on him. The others made fun of him, but he understood. He parted his legs and watched a beetle in the grass crawl between them.

Sidney had noticed the young man approaching. He had seen his reflection in Vera's silver earring and it alarmed him. He felt his heart speed up, and he was tempted to grab Vera and bolt from the park. Vera hadn't noticed the change in Sidney's demeanor from annoyance to fear. She was busy voicing her complaints about their financial arrangements and how she wouldn't have even bought the lingerie if it were up to her. The stuff made her feel low class and it was made of nylon which was not good for the skin from what she had read in a health magazine. Sidney wasn't listening to her. He stared hard and long into her earring at what he thought he saw, but he was too scared to actually turn and see for himself. Sidney nonchalantly reached down and picked up a beer bottle cap and examined it. Even more nonchalantly, he looked around for a trashcan. He locked eyes with the young man who did indeed remind him of Dino. Sidney quickly glanced past him as if something was sneaking up on the young man who whipped his head around, giving Sidney the opportunity to steal a glance down at the young man’s thighs. The young man turned his head back to Sidney who was already staring back into Vera's earring, his wariness now replaced with anxious confusion.

The young man rose off the grass and circled to their right, walking almost sideways, crab-like, so that the front of his body faced Sidney. Vera complained about the park and how dirty it was. She was hot and felt a headache coming on, her usual precursor to being pre-menstrual. Sidney wasn’t listening as he watched the young man pause some ten feet off to the side of Vera and strike a defiant pose, his legs wide apart and his hands planted on his hips. He stared arrogantly at Sidney, then downwards, then back up at Sidney repeating the gesture until Sidney followed the motion and realized what was being indicated. Running down the inside of the young man's thigh was a thick bulge stretching halfway to his knee. Sidney stared disbelievingly at the thing. A prank, a crude, disgusting, Hispanic teenage prank. The young man had put something in his pants, a sausage or a cucumber or something, and now he was sticking it in these white people's faces to repulse them. Sidney shook his head condescendingly and grabbed Vera by the arm, pulling her to her feet and ushering her away from this dirty young man, from this dirty park and these dirty people. Thank god Vera hadn't seen it.

When they were almost to the car, Sidney heard a shrill whistle. He turned to look, and there it was. He stumbled into Vera as she was getting into the car, causing her to bang her head. Her protests were dimmed by the roar of engine followed by the screeching of tires, while Sidney, barely able to focus on the road ahead, felt a dull ache in the center of his chest, due most likely to the violent pounding of his heart.

Later that night in bed, Vera again asked Sidney why they had left the park so quickly. He closed his eyes, feigning sleep, but all he saw was the young man in the park, standing behind them, pulling up the leg of his shorts, and exposing the head of his massive penis. It was not a prank. It was real. It was bizarre. A freak of nature, a skinny, scrawny young man with a dick more suited for a giant. Sidney played the image over and over in his head until he heard Vera breathing heavy, asleep. Sidney eventually drifted off and dreamt that he and Vera were in a gondola along a Venice canal, manned by Dino, under a full moon. Beautiful, serene, romantic. Dino started laughing, only it sounded like Vera’s mother. Suddenly, a killer whale rose out of the water and grasped Vera in its jaws. She screamed as the whale carried her away and Sidney jerked awake. Vera asked him what he was dreaming about but Sidney told her to go back to sleep.

Throughout the next week, Sidney had trouble concentrating at work. Compounding this was Vera's refusal to have sex because of her period, even though he knew the blood flow was a mere trickle. They planned on going to their favorite restaurant on Saturday night, but the mere thought of Dino's eyes dissuaded Sidney who suggested someplace else, but Vera felt the carrot cake would help her cramps. She had read in a woman’s magazine that carrots helped alleviate PMS. The next day, Sunday, Sidney told Vera he had to run by the office to check on some things and would be back in a couple of hours. He pulled the car over at the park and walked back to the same spot where he and Vera had seen Sergio. He lingered in the general area, feeling more vulnerable than he imagined possible. It felt different than sitting in the car eating his lunch. Now it was so much noisier, with kids running about all about, sometimes running into him and Hispanic music blaring from speakers and a soccer game in progress nearby with men yelling and women cheering. It was frenetic and Sidney moved away from the area wondering if he was a pervert and didn’t know it. Without warning, he felt a tremendous pressure on his bladder and realized he needed to get to a bathroom desperately. He hurried back to his car but passed a sign indicating the direction of public restrooms.

The rest rooms were located in another part of the park near a wooded picnic area. It was shaded and quiet. Sensing relief a mere thirty feet away, he high-stepped it towards the sign marked MEN. As he closed in the doorway, the young man appeared and Sidney immediately stopped at a nearby water fountain and took a drink. He turned around without looking at the young man and walked in the opposite direction but had to stop at a picnic table and sit down for fear he might urinate in his pants. Any movement intensified the pressure, coupled with the extra liquid he had just consumed. He sat very still and tried to control his breathing while he strained to hold back his bladder. He heard a stick snap and he jerked his head around. The young man circled nearby suspiciously eyeing Sidney. This time the young man wore baggy long pants. He stopped in front of Sidney who said hello, but the young man said nothing. After a few moments, he asked Sidney where his wife was. Sidney was taken aback but told him that Vera was not his wife. Girlfriend? They live together. The young man sat down on the end of the table and picked his teeth with a twig while looking everywhere, except at Sidney who remained very still. A group of teenage boys walked by and hollered something in Spanish at the young man who ignored them. Sidney asked him what they had said. The young man said they had called him a name. Sidney asked him what the name was. The young man told him in Spanish and Sidney asked him to translate it. The young man told him it meant mule. Sidney felt a twinge go through him. He asked the young man his real name. Sergio.

Sergio told Sidney that all the boys make fun of him. The girls too, except for the older ones who always try to get him to be with them. He hated them all. He hated his own people because they didn't understand him. They thought he was a freak, and a homosexual. Sergio said he was neither. He was just different. He asked Sidney if Vera thought he was gay. Sidney said Vera had not seen him and probably wouldn’t remember even if she had. Sergio said that Vera was probably a nice lady, not like the ones in his neighborhood.

Sidney couldn't restrain himself any longer. He excused himself and hurried to the bathroom wondering how he must look to Sergio. Sidney entered the bathroom, his penis already out and squirting on the wet concrete floor as he waddled to the urinal. He emitted a gasp, his urine bursting out of him, splashing against the stained white porcelain and leaving droplets on his shoes. Sidney felt such relief that he hadn’t even noticed Sergio now at the urinal next to him. Sidney did become acutely aware of his presence when Sergio dug deep into his pants. The bathroom stunk and Sidney held his breath, which only seemed to accentuate the pounding of his heart. He wanted to bolt from the bathroom but was still peeing strongly, not nearly close to being finished. Sidney carefully exhaled so as not to give away his heavy breathing while pretending to study the cracks in the concrete ceiling. He finally dropped his head and gaze downward and there he saw it out of the corner of his eye.

The young man truly was a freak. It hung out of his pants like the trunk of an elephant. A thick, yellow urine stream poured into the urinal as if shot from a hose. Sidney tried desperately hard not to look and Sergio laughed. Sidney looked into the young man's dark eyes. Sergio asked Sidney if he was afraid it would bite him. Sidney laughed as well, breaking the tension. He cleared his throat and told Sergio that he had read somewhere that the actual size of a penis was not determined by its flaccid state. In other words, a penis that is six inches long limp may only grow to seven or eight inches when hard, whereas a penis that is three or four inches long at rest may grow as much as three times larger. Sergio looked at him questioningly, then adamantly exclaimed that his penis got much bigger. Sidney said he didn't doubt that, he was only pointing out...Sergio said he would prove it. Sidney felt his knees buckle. Now this sordid mess had gone too far, and in a public bathroom with this young man who looked like a boy. This was how people got in big trouble with the law, how lives were ruined. Sidney quickly jammed his own penis back into his pants, fidgeting with his zipper but Sergio told him to look, and Sidney took a step back. It seemed to have a life of its own, uncoiling like a boa constrictor. Sidney stared, mesmerized, while Sergio giggled, playful, like he was showing a friend his pet. When it had reached it's full size, Sergio held it up for display, a merchant displaying a gold bar. Sidney wanted to run and never, ever, return to this bathroom, this park, ever again his entire life. Yet, he couldn’t move, not a muscle, like in a dream, unable to run when pursued. He felt he was losing the opportunity to flee from this ominous power that had invaded his life and seemed to be taking control and taking him...to where? Disgrace? Disaster?

He also felt the urge to grab Sergio’s penis. Sergio told him that once he measured it with a tape measure from his mother’s sewing basket. Thirteen-inches long. Eight-inches around. The statistics fell upon Sidney like huge waves, rocking and disorienting him until he heard voices outside of the bathroom and told Sergio he had to go. He left the park as quickly as he could without running, never looking back.

Over dinner that night, Sidney told Vera that he had stopped by the park earlier for some fresh air--due to the power failure at the office--and he saw the young man from a couple of weeks ago, the one who reminded her of Dino. Vera let out a high-pitched feminine screech, and then nearly choked on a piece of red snapper. Sidney slapped her on the back and demanded an explanation. When she recovered she told him that she had just spoken to their friends, that very day, about the young man. What friends? She told Sidney that after he left, she went down to the pool and ran into the car salesman and his wife.

Sidney explained that the boy was in fact a young man, nineteen to be exact, but Vera ignored this or wasn’t listening and continued with her recollection of how the three of them really laughed when she told them about the bulge in the young man's shorts. Now it was Sidney’s turn to experience a gagging sensation in his throat. He couldn’t comprehend what Vera just said, even though he knew it was one of the most significant things she had ever said, or that he had ever heard in his life. How did she notice the bulge? When did she notice? Sidney again felt in the dark, out of the loop as Vera, looking baffled herself, replied that she thought they had already discussed it. Of course they hadn't talked about it. They have never talked about anything even remotely related to bulges in pants. Vera was truly perplexed. She suggested that maybe she had dreamed of talking about bulges. He wondered if she was also dreaming about Sergio. Vera stared curiously at Sidney and asked him if anything was the matter. He said nothing.

Sergio stayed at the park waiting for Sidney to return. He checked the picnic area, then the bathrooms, then the original spot where he had first seen Vera and Sidney. He walked along the street looking for Sidney's nice car. It was a new, expensive car, classy, like Sidney's watch. Everything that Sidney had was classy, even his girlfriend. After Sidney had left that Sunday, Sergio felt that his life had changed. He was no longer poor Sergio who had to share a room with three sisters and two cousins, in a small house inhabited by a total of eleven people including his grandmother. He hated the house. He never saw anybody on television that lived like he did. Someday, he would have a big house and a fancy car, but he was growing impatient. All Sergio had now was something that had always given him problems. For as long as he could remember, people treated him as if he had a disease, a deformity. No more. Now he had Sidney and his girlfriend, and they didn't treat him like that at all. They understood. Sergio had seen it in their eyes that first day. He knew that his prayers had finally been answered the day he emerged from the restroom and found Sidney waiting for him.

The park was empty, even ghostly save for the crickets chirping and clicking sometimes in unison sounding almost conspiratorial the way they would suddenly stop. Sidney hoped he wouldn't have to leave the relative safety of his car to get what he was after. Fifteen minute later, he finally climbed out but leaned against his hood, trying desperately to affect a nonchalant. It was at times like these that he wished he smoked cigarettes. He could always start. He waited another fifteen minutes, then walked across the street and disappeared into the darkness of the park.

Sidney quickly found the original spot and sat down, then just as quickly stood back up, feeling safer on his feet in case he needed to flee for some reason. He checked his watch. He would give it another fifteen minutes here, then head for the restrooms. He put himself on fifteen minute intervals and would give the restrooms their fifteen before he exiting the park, never to return, a chapter fortunately closed forever in his life.

When he got back to his car, he found Sergio sitting on the fender, smiling. Sidney unlocked the doors and they got in. Sergio told Sidney that he had not left the park all day because he knew Sidney would be back. How did he know this? Sergio’s stomach growled and Sidney asked him if he was hungry. Sergio said that he ate with some friends having a barbeque in the park. They sat in silence and Sidney wondered what to do next.

Sergio smiled as they pulled into the new condominium complex, passing the guardhouse without stopping, and winding their way through the labyrinth of overly planned, contrived lanes, not streets. La Costa Lane. Del Mar Lane. This wasn't the big fancy house Sergio had imagined, but it was just as good, especially when they passed the decorative fountain in the center of the complex. Sergio felt like he was in a television show. When the garage door automatically opened, Sergio asked if they could do it again so that he could push the remote. Sidney said some other time. Sergio didn't care because he was already looking at the other nice car in the garage, just as expensive as Sidney's. It must belong to his girlfriend. Sergio told himself that when he got older, he would have a girlfriend who drove a car like that. Then he would have everything.

Sergio followed Sidney up the stairs leaning from the garage to the back door of the condominium. Sergio’s mood dramatically shifted from exuberant to humility. Sidney also changed, curtly instructing Sergio not to make any noise while he informed Vera they would be having a guest tonight. He told Sergio to sit on the couch and Sergio obeyed like a well-trained dog. He watched Sidney disappear down a hallway. Sergio didn’t move for minutes, then slowly leaned back on the white couch, so clean compared to the stained furniture at his parent’s house. He smiled, and thanked the Virgin for answering his prayers.

Sidney peaked into the bedroom before entering. Vera slept, demurely curled under the covers, looking far more attractive asleep than awake. More relaxed. Supple. Vera stirred again and the thought of Sergio there, under the same roof with Vera sent a shudder of arousal through Sidney. He gently placed his hand on Vera's hip but she didn't move. He then leaned over and kissed her on the neck. Still nothing. He gave her a quick lick on the ear and she knocked his hand off her hip and told him to stop. She was tired and wanted to sleep. Sidney's arousal turned to rage, but he controlled himself. He told her very matter of fact that he had to talk to her about something. She shot back that it could wait until morning and please leave her alone. She pulled the covers up almost over her head. Sidney was stunned by the icy tone of her voice. He had never experienced such hostility from her. He feared telling her about Sergio, afraid she would explode with anger for bringing him back. Sidney crept out of the bedroom, closing the door as carefully as if he was diffusing a bomb. He saw a glow emanating from the living room and when he rounded the corner, he found Sergio watching music videos with the sound down. Sergio quickly turned off the TV explaining he was lonely. Sidney knew he was definitely going to take Sergio back, just as soon as he got a few hours sleep. What a day. He gave Sergio a blanket and a pillow and asked him not to watch TV.

Then Sidney poured himself a shot of brandy, drank it, and went to bed.

He cautiously slid in beside Vera and lay there staring at the vaulted ceiling, afraid the minute he fell asleep Vera would wake up, go into the living room, and let out a blood-curdling scream. Sidney checked his breathing, irregular and short. He would have to start jogging; either that or stop bringing strange young men back to his place in the middle of the night. It was insane what he had done, was doing, and he had no idea why he had embarked on such an act of sheer madness. He closed his eyes for a moment and decided not to go to sleep. He would meditate, resting his body without sleep, like the old men in India. Simply concentrate on rest and you didn't need sleep. Maybe this was why he had gone to the park. Maybe it was all a new beginning for Sidney. Helping out this kid. Jogging and esoteric meditation techniques. For this night, Sidney would not sleep, whatsoever, regardless of whether he rested or not.

When Sidney awoke, he didn't know where he was at first. Sidney startled awake, his heart pounding harder than it ever had. He thought he was having a heart attack and told Vera to call the emergency number. Vera said nothing. He looked over at her and realized she wasn't there. He heard the noise again. Somebody was in pain, was being hurt, but he couldn't recognized the voice. Sidney jumped to his feet but grabbed his head. He sank back down to keep from passing out. Every time his heart pounded, it felt like blood was being pumped into his brain, like a water balloon ready to burst. He tried to control his breathing, but heard the noise again. Vera. He had to go to her, save her, and stop whatever horrible thing was being done to her. He slowly stood and moved towards the door, still holding his head. When he opened the door, the noise grew louder. He stopped to gather his senses. Sergio. He must be choking her, or stabbing her. He always knew that it was true that Hispanic men carried knives. Sidney now saw that Sergio had planned it all--a plot to murder and rob them--and he was taking care of Vera first. Sidney pushed forward down the hall, bouncing off the wall as he went, the noise growing louder and louder as his resolve to kill Sergio grew. He rounded the corner, and immediately leaped back, as if a giant hand had reached deep inside of him, grabbed his spine, and jerked him backwards. He replayed the image in his head, trying to determine if he was hallucinating or not. What he had seen was Sergio on top of Vera. He knew that. But he was not stabbing her, or choking her. Vera's moans grew louder and louder bringing Sidney to his senses. Yet it was still confusing. He had never heard Vera make a noise like that. He had thought she was in pain. That was the most disturbing thing to him…that he actually thought she was in pain.

Sidney peered cautiously around the corner, paralyzed with fear that they might see him looking at them. It had not occurred to him that Sergio and Vera were oblivious to the world right now. Sidney's eyes adjusted and he saw it clearly. He could see Sergio's erect penis, passing in and out of Vera while she clawed wildly at the couch, at Sergio, writhing beneath him and acting like some kind of irrational wanton creature. Then it finally hit him, came crashing down on him. Sergio’s monstrous dick was causing her to moan like she never had with him.

Sergio slowly raised up and down on her, his movements were smooth, steady and dominating. His thrusts were deep, but not as deep as he could go. He would save that for some other time. He didn't want her to pass out. She was already wetter than any girl he had ever had, but he knew she would be that way. It was a tight fit and he liked that. He wished she would open her eyes and look at him but he could understand why she kept them closed. They all acted that way the first time, until they got used to it. The power had overtaken him and now it was up to him to run it out to the end. His dick was rock hard, and his balls had pulled up tight and close to the shaft. He liked this feeling. It made him feel like it was simply a muscle with a purpose, and not some dirty thing hanging between his legs that everyone laughed at. He stroked her relentlessly, never wavering from the rhythm he had established. He would do this till he was through, when he felt the last squirt. Then he would pull it out and let it rest, though he knew he didn't have to. It was always ready for more, and someday he would find somebody who was also ready for more. Maybe Vera, but not tonight. Sergio was not sure she would last till he finished.

The pain that Vera had initially felt, that searing, burning sensation cutting through her pelvic area had given way to a complete submission to pleasure. The very thing that had scared her more than anything had ever scared her was now absolutely dominating her with pleasure, like nothing had ever dominated her before. Not her mother, not Sidney, not anyone. Now she was totally taken, and she never wanted it to stop. His constant movements, the fullness, the sensation of it moving in and out of her was changing her by the minute, with each incredible stroke, and she eagerly submitted to it, though she felt there was no choice. This, yes, this was what she had always, always wanted, and was what she was always so afraid to admit. The dreams, all those dreams she had had over so many years, dreams that had seemed like nightmares, of big men with huge dicks, impaling her, ramming in her, hanging her up to dry on their big dicks. She would awaken full of remorse, and spend the next day trying to forget, and rationalize, and analyze herself out of the truth that had trailed her for years like a wild hungry dog in the desert. If she had only known what she had been missing. If she had only known that it was as simple as getting fucked raw by a monster dick...think of the pain she would have avoided. Which is why that initial shot of pain had quickly given way to bliss, knowing she would never again suffer from not knowing what it was that was torturing her. To not know was worse than the torture itself. But how she wanted to really fuck him. She wanted to spread her legs as far as they would absolutely go, and have him plunging into her, digging into her, taking her out of this world with his magnificent dick. What a thing it was. It had scared her so much, and now she craved it, every movement of it, tightly filling her up while sparking sensations in an area she thought was dead. It tingled down there, then heated, with burning, vibrating waves of still more sensation coming on stronger with each orgasm. She breathed harder and moaned louder, working it out. This time she heard Sergio also breathing and moaning, and this was too unbelievable. Was he really going to climax with her? Was she going to get that, along with everything else? It was so hard to accept that she was getting everything, absolutely everything she had always wanted in a man. She had stopped believing in this years ago, and had resigned herself to simply being stable and numb. Now this young Hispanic guy, this freak, was opening her up like a ripe fig? Sidney thrusted harder and Vera's moans became outright screams. How could she take it any harder? She was about to split down the middle already. It was starting to burn and she pleaded with him to stop, but he only increased his movements and now she was afraid he was going to damage her. Yet, another fear, and she might as well accept it, also. She would never have this opportunity again, she would never be able to have intercourse again, so she should make the best of it. She relented and immediately felt something building in her, throbbing with his movements, his breathing, his moans. She felt it in her thighs, pushing up towards her vagina, as it got closer, it burned hotter. She felt something inside of her let go and now she was moving wildly, her hands on his hips, pulling him into her. She felt her legs spreading as if being pulled magically apart. Sergio plunged deeper, withdrawing almost to the head and plunging once again, each time sending a scream from Vera that went through him and invigorated him on. He felt his balls tightening and knew it was coming. He had waited for this and was ready to burst. Since he had first seen her in the park, he vowed not to have an orgasm, no matter the circumstances, till he could do it in her. Now, he would give it to her, the full force of his power. Sergio pinned her legs back and plowed into her, boring in, penetrating deeply, feeling his penis knock against her insides. At the moment of climax, he stopped for a moment, holding it back until the last possible moment, then he shoved it into her as far as he could, and squirted a long, hot stream of sperm.

Vera felt it. She actually felt it spray inside of her, a hot liquid, coating her, and setting off a long vibration. Sergio continued plunging and coming inside of her, his warm sperm gurgling out of her, soaking the couch beneath them.

Sidney steadied himself against the wall, hunched down, a voyeur in his own home. He had watched Vera, the woman of his life, come alive with another man like she had never done with him. What he'd just witnessed ran through his head again and again, her moans and screams echoing through his psyche. When he first looked around the corner, he felt like he had come across a couple of animals. He had leapt back thinking that to disturb them would be going against nature. He had slowly peered back around the corner, feeling paralyzed by the thick, amorous intensity of their lovemaking, then felt in their lust, like in a dream where movement are leaden. Sergio had writhed upon her, a python curling around it's prey. Sidney had been dismayed by the reality of it, how apparent it was that the myth, the propaganda, that size didn't matter, was now a truth too frightening to face. He had watched Sergio's body rise higher and higher above her, his penis revealing it's full length, glistening and veined. Then Sergio had fallen, sinking into her, with Vera letting out a wail of pleasure that seared Sidney's ears. He knew that Vera had climaxed not merely a few times, but a multitude of times. That her capacity for orgasm was unlimited, like any woman. The power of this fact shook Sidney's male world with 8.0 earthquake intensity, leveling all previous notions of sexuality. His life in an instant of pleasure not his own.

Sidney had even noticed the details, how Vera had dug her nails into Sergio's back. How cliched´, Sidney thought; but there it was, the fact of it, as obvious and real as Vera wrapping her legs around Sergio and pleading with him to fuck her harder, to not stop, ever. Sidney felt each of Sergio's thrusts, pounding at his own concept of himself as a man, breaking down his resistance to opening up to the truth of what was happening in his life. Sidney wanted to see it all over again for real. He wanted to see Vera take it into her mouth, choking and gagging as Sergio pushed it back into her throat. He wanted to see Sergio make her want it, as she had never really wanted him. Before this night, when Sidney had questioned her about her desire for him, she had always insisted that it was there, then deftly followed with an excuse. Fatigue. Cramps. Yeast infection. Bladder infection. Kidney infection. When she was healthy, she was dry. There was always an excuse. Then came the endearing hug and nurturing kiss, and the simple fact that at least he had an intelligent woman who shared his bed and cared about him. Wasn't that enough?

It wasn't. That was the truth that for so long Sidney could feel but not see. Now he had seen it. He had the physical evidence. He had heard Vera moan deeply, unrecognizably, and he knew that the only reason she was moaning with such passion was because of Sergio, and

because of his dick. He had seen Vera pull it out of her and hold it with both hands, pumping it roughly, then teasing herself with it, like a woman possessed, rubbing the large head against her clitoris till Sergio shoved it back into her, once again resuming control while Vera’s lost her’s. As if choreographed, Vera would throw back her head and gasp, her hands shooting out, her whole body trembling almost spamodically. Sidney's own body would lurch slightly each time and he would grip the wall harder, and try to control his breathing so that they wouldn't hear, or he wouldn't hyperventilate and pass out. By the end, when Sergio was relentless and Vera had completely surrendered, Sidney had found himself unable to think and disseminate his thoughts. His whole body was pulsing and as they screamed and gasped, so did Sydney, his knees buckling so that he slid to the floor, staying there until he noticed his pants were wet. Urinating on himself seemed in keeping with the humiliation he thought he should be feeling. He then realized that he too had climaxed, and never had he emitted so much semen, not even when he was younger. A myriad of thoughts had passed through his head. He originally thought he was going to be with Sergio. Wasn't that why he had first seen him at the park? Wasn't that his initial interest in Sergio and his dick? But why had he even thought that in the first place? He had never felt any desire for another man, at least not that he could remember. He had thought he felt desire for Sergio. He had been so mesmerized by Sergio's penis, replaying the image of it in his mind like a mantra.

Sidney heard whispers coming from the living room, then movement. Horrified at the idea of being caught, Sidney scurried back to the bedroom and quietly closed the door. He lay in bed, his heart racing. He heard footsteps outside the door, then the door handle moving. He turned over and tried to control his breathing. He closed his eyes and waited, like he was about to be executed. Vera slid naked into the bed beside him. She wrapped her arm around him like she always did, but now something was different. She felt softer, more supple, warmer. She whispered his name. Her voice was different, deeper, liquid. She pulled on his shoulders, turning him around to face her. He kept his eyes closed. She told him that she knew he was awake, that he had to have heard them, but she couldn't explain what had happened, what was happening. Sidney's lips were tightly closed and his jaw was clenched. To open his mouth, even to protest, would be opening himself to even more of this experience invading his life, holding him prisoner. He didn't want to be a part of it anymore. He wished he was alone, that they would leave. Vera asked him how he felt. His heart began pounding and she noticed this. She pulled him closer and told him that everything was okay, that she loved him, more than ever. Sidney finally asked about Sergio, what was to happen with him. Vera asked him what he felt they should do about him. Sidney wanted him to leave. He wanted him to have never existed. He wanted their life back the way it was, before, he asked Vera to buy the lingerie. Yes, that was the problem, that was the beginning of this madness, he surmised. It was his fault. He was corrupting her. Vera's mother was right about him all along. Vera asked Sidney if she should tell Sergio to leave. Sidney felt trapped. He knew she didn't want Sergio to leave; he could hear it in her voice. He couldn't take the responsibility of making Sergio leave, of depriving Vera of him. Yet, Sidney felt so uncomfortable in his own bedroom, like the condo was no longer his home, and he didn't belong there. His heart pounded harder and Vera pulled him closer to him. She asked him if he was aroused. The directness of her question stunned him, to say nothing of the tone of her voice, this woman he no longer knew, or never knew. He answered her like a schoolboy. He didn't know, but he wished his heart would slow down because it was starting to hurt. Vera told him she thought he was aroused, very aroused, and he just wasn't admitting it. If he did, he would feel better. Sidney knew she was right. If he admitted it, however, he would basically be giving his approval for what happened tonight, and then he would completely lose control of the situation, of his home, of Vera. It was a supreme moment of truth for him, and his ears burned feverishly. He had stuck a toilet paper tube on his penis and had tried to masturbate with it, imagining it was an older girl up the street.

Vera kissed Sidney out of his memory returning him to the present with a hot, wet succulent kiss, her lips more pliable than he could remember. She stuck her tongue deep into his mouth, a first, and Sidney's penis went immediately erect. Vera felt it against her hip and grabbed it. Overcome with desire, and not really thinking about what he was doing or why he was doing it, Sydney mounted Vera stuck it into her as quickly as he could. She gasped a little, but immediately responded, grinding into him while she pulled his hips closer to him. Sidney was shocked at how wet and hot her vagina was. It was like he had stuck his dick into a bowl of hot glue. As he pumped into her he heard her vagina make slurping noises, which grew louder and louder each time he pushed. Vera panted and urged him on. Each time she spoke, Sidney felt like he was having sex with a total stranger, not the woman he had lived with the past six years. This new woman, and this unfamiliarity with her sexuality, excited Sidney to the point where he was climaxing within minutes. He let out a yelp, which surprised him, since he never made noise while having sex. Usually, he just breathed harder for a few seconds, and then was quiet, until he would suggest they clean up.

Vera was not surprised that Sidney had made noise. By now, nothing was surprising her and she was moving with the flow, a fallen leaf bobbling down a brook. She giggled at Sidney, and her confidence stunned him. Now he must talk and inevitably me must ask exactly what was going on? Her answer was just as inevitable. She didn't know. They lay in silence. Finally, Sidney asked what they were going to do about Sergio. Vera's passion caused her mind to misunderstand Sidney for she immediately suggested they invite him in. Her answer confused him. In where? His response to her answer confused her. Meanwhile, Sergio waited just outside the bedroom door. Sidney asked Vera point blank what her intentions were. Vera started to fall back on her old self and said she didn't have any intentions. It was Sidney who had brought the guy home in the first place. Sidney protested that he had given the ‘guy' a break, but he hadn't given him the green light to have sex with her. Vera told him that maybe he better take him home if it was becoming a problem. Sidney froze, her tone instantly recalling memories of their past and how loathsome it would be returning to it. He stared at the ceiling roughly textured acoustic ceiling, wondering if the neighbors heard them, until he noticed the bed shaking due to his increased heart rate. Vera noticed too, curling her lip into a smile. She patted his face, like the hurt puppy he was, and told him not to fight it, to give in to what was happening to their lives. He thought he had already given in, or fallen in. Sidney felt the room turning, spinning like a Ferris wheel, turning his life upside down and around. He told himself he had to stop putting his heart through so much stress. His father had problems with his heart, and he would too if he wasn't careful. With this in mind, with his ears and face burning as if someone had thrown acid on him, with Vera beside him vibrating with anticipation, Sidney made a decision that he knew would affect his life forever. Maybe he was the closing out his involvement with Vera; or maybe he was opening up to the richness of rebirth. His mind was made up regardless. Very quietly, Sidney told Vera to go get him. If Sidney had turned at that moment to face Vera, he would have seen her expression and maybe he wouldn't have been so surprised by the events of the next couple of months. Instead, he just closed his eyes and waited till she returned with Sergio. Vera gazed into Sidney’s eyes, more deeply than ever before, but it seemed as if she were saying farewell forever to a loved one, before she launched into outer space. Intuitively, she knew what Sidney wanted, and she knew how much he was resisting it. She knew because she had resisted it. Sidney was now an open book to her, and she read him flawlessly; quite the dramatic reversal of their relationship. Vera wanted to spring out of the bed and run for Sergio, but felt it best to be reserved, like one would around a person in mourning for instance. She slid out of the bed and padded gracefully across the bedroom glancing over her shoulder at Sidney, still staring at the ceiling, but at nothing. He lay perfectly still, in state, for viewing. He was afraid to move and this fear had actually slowed his heart down. Amazed at this control, he analyzed the possibility that in order to completely relax, one had to feign death, the very thing that frightened people the most. And why had he come to this realization on this particular night? How interesting. How very interesting. It was as if...he felt the bed move, and realized he had forgotten about them so absorbed in his thought. Vera had slipped in next to him, bumping Sidney to move over. He moved to the edge as he felt the bed sink with the extra weight.

Now what? Would they sleep like that, the three of them, side by side by side? Sidney considered this. He turned over to check the time. Five o'clock. Yes it was definitely time for sleep. He was exhausted and he was sure they were, too. Sidney turned his back to them and went back to his death state meditation. What bliss. He told himself seven times not to forget how he had reached this awareness. On the sixth time, he felt his head nod, by the seventh, he was out, dreaming about the office. Some people had erotic dreams, but not Sidney. He dreamed about work, and usually about the mundane details of work, like ordering refills for his desk calendar. But now his dream seemed different. He was at work, but the people were acting different. They walked around with gleams in their eyes, and he heard noises coming from the offices. His boss walked by naked, dragging a gigantic erection. He heard moans of passion all around him. His eyes were open and he felt something knocking up against him. He blinked his eyes, trying to get his bearings. He heard Vera moaning softly, muffled. He felt the bed rocking. He pretended for a moment like he really didn't know what was happening beside him. He even closed his eyes again and tried going back to sleep. It was ridiculously impossible and he knew it. Still, he wouldn't move, he wouldn't act. He just lay there, facing the opposite direction while Vera's moaning grew louder and the rocking more intense. He now heard a squishing noise as Sergio's penis plunged in and out of Vera reminding Sidney of a butter urn.

Then he felt Vera's hand on his side, rubbing him in rhythm with the rocking of the bed and the sound of her moans. He felt himself slowly turning, knowing that if he did, he would be admitting, conceding, and surrendering what little power he had left. He glanced over and felt a jolt of arousal. Watching them safely from the hall was one thing, having them right next to him was something else. Now, he felt drawn into their passion, as if he was a part of it, and in fact he was, for Vera had slid her hand down and was stroking his penis. He started to recoil from her touch but she grasped it and pumped harder. Sergio in turn pushed harder and Vera gasped, releasing Sidney, the fingers on her hands flexed and extended as the sensations shot through her body. She grabbed blindly for Sidney but Sergio increased the intensity and started kissing her. She withdrew her hand up to Sergio's face and held it while she moaned and kissed him, sucking his tongue as if sucking the marrow of life itself. Sergio reached down and pulled her legs back farther, deeply penetrating her, relentlessly kissing her, and Vera's moaning became a constant drone, broken only by the onslaught of yet another orgasm. Sidney watched Vera's entire body draw up into Sergio with every part of her responding to him. He felt so humbled by the entire experience. Humbled that this person much younger, less educated and privileged, had become his teacher, even master. Humbled that every myth he had thought was a myth, was now unbearably true. Humbled the truth of these myths, probably created and maintained by men and women who had the same fear as him: accepting life as it is, and not as they wish it to be. He withdrew into himself, now observing them as if he was a watcher in his own dream. The short space between his body and theirs could have been an infinite chasm.

Vera finally pushed Sergio off of her telling him no more. She curled up into a fetal position and within a minute, she was asleep. Sidney lay awake on one side of her and Sergio lay awake on the other, but with his eyes closed. Sidney knew he was awake, but speaking was not even considered. He would talk to him when he took him back to the park later that day. Sidney closed his eyes, imagining the park, the children running and screaming, the pungent smell of roasting chicken roasting on open fires. The birds singing, reminding everyone that Nature carries on despite humanity.

THE END